Bob's success story.

[newsmike]

Once upon a time there was a guy named Bob. Bob ate some soup at a restaurant and saw lots of people enjoying it. Bob decided that he could make a killing selling soup. So Bob got a space and a hot plate and set about making soup. Now Bob had no idea how to make soup. In fact Bob struggled with Top Ramen. But undeterred, Bob hung a sign up to advertise his soup which read "EXPART SOAP." A couple people came in to buy soap, but Bob gave them soup instead, and then complained when the customers gave him lousy Yelp reviews. 

Frustrated by this, Bob posted his woes to social media and his friends were swift with advice. 

Axel, his best friend tried the soup and told Bob that the soup tasted like grey water from a washing machine after a load of diapers. He was trying to be nice. It wasn't actually that good. The suggestion was made to improve the recipe and learn how to actually make soup.   

Bob's friend Jamal made a different suggestion. He told Bob to just "be patient" and keep doing what he was doing and somehow business would improve.

Hans told Bob that the key to success was simply to remain open 24/7. Hans even suggested a sign that read "OPEN" even when the store was closed.  

Phoebe said the big "SOAP" sign was not good enough and suggested that he put a picture of soup in the window to reduce the confusion of the customers looking for soap. So Bob went to an nearby restaurant, took a picture of their soup and placed it in his window. He also removed his portrait from the window and put a photo of Gordon Ramsay in its place.

Pierre, the SEO expert gave Bob advice which said to change the keywords on his website to low competition keywords. So Bob removed Soap and replaced it with "ashtray".

Minsky told Bob that the way to get business would to to pray for success.

So, what happened? With the passage of time, Bob tried all the suggestions. He prayed, he took pictures of soup from even more competitors, he eventually changed his keyword to "please help me", he kept the sign that said OPEN even when he was home sleeping and he remained patient. Yes, he tried every suggestion, except the suggestion that he learn to make good soup. 

Nowadays Bob spends most of his time on a park bench, telling anyone who will listen how unfair the Soup game is. He goes on at length about how none of his competitors helped him get business. How he tried all his friend's suggestions even though not one of them has been successful, but most of all how rude Axel was. You see it was Axel who focused on the "Quality of the Product." But that hurt Bob's feelings, plus it sounded like more work as opposed to shuffling deck chairs on the Titanic.

The moral of the story.

1. Don't take advice from people who are not successful.

2. If you are not successful, don't offer advice.

3. Bob should have had smarter friends. 

4. Don't do dumb stuff to fix your gig. Improve your product quality.

p.s. Axel now lives in Switzerland with a beautiful family and drives a Ferrari. Sometimes he chuckles about Bob when he has a bowl of Soup, but it passes quickly.

Edited January 9, 2023 by newsmike

[maitasun]

 

[newsmike]

You know for the "Pray for success" people, I always think of this.

Edited January 9, 2023 by newsmike

[sabinespoems]

[spaintranslator]

This is the best I've read on this forum. 😄

[filipdevaere]

Nice story.

[vickiespencer]

[sanaaliabbasi]

4 hours ago, newsmike said:

Once upon a time there was a guy named Bob. Bob ate some soup at a restaurant and saw lots of people enjoying it. Bob decided that he could make a killing selling soup. So Bob got a space and a hot plate and set about making soup. Now Bob had no idea how to make soup. In fact Bob struggled with Top Ramen. But undeterred, Bob hung a sign up to advertise his soup which read "EXPART SOAP." A couple people came in to buy soap, but Bob gave them soup instead, and then complained when the customers gave him lousy Yelp reviews. 

Frustrated by this, Bob posted his woes to social media and his friends were swift with advice. 

Axel, his best friend tried the soup and told Bob that the soup tasted like grey water from a washing machine after a load of diapers. He was trying to be nice. It wasn't actually that good. The suggestion was made to improve the recipe and learn how to actually make soup.   

Bob's friend Jamal made a different suggestion. He told Bob to just "be patient" and keep doing what he was doing and somehow business would improve.

Hans told Bob that the key to success was simply to remain open 24/7. Hans even suggested a sign that read "OPEN" even when the store was closed.  

Phoebe said the big "SOAP" sign was not good enough and suggested that he put a picture of soup in the window to reduce the confusion of the customers looking for soap. So Bob went to an nearby restaurant, took a picture of their soup and placed it in his window. He also removed his portrait from the window and put a photo of Gordon Ramsay in its place.

Pierre, the SEO expert gave Bob advice which said to change the keywords on his website to low competition keywords. So Bob removed Soap and replaced it with "ashtray".

Minsky told Bob that the way to get business would to to pray for success.

So, what happened? With the passage of time, Bob tried all the suggestions. He prayed, he took pictures of soup from even more competitors, he eventually changed his keyword to "please help me", he kept the sign that said OPEN even when he was home sleeping and he remained patient. Yes, he tried every suggestion, except the suggestion that he learn to make good soup. 

Nowadays Bob spends most of his time on a park bench, telling anyone who will listen how unfair the Soup game is. He goes on at length about how none of his competitors helped him get business. How he tried all his friend's suggestions even though not one of them has been successful, but most of all how rude Axel was. You see it was Axel who focused on the "Quality of the Product." But that hurt Bob's feelings, plus it sounded like more work as opposed to shuffling deck chairs on the Titanic.

The moral of the story.

1. Don't take advice from people who are not successful.

2. If you are not successful, don't offer advice.

3. Bob should have had smarter friends. 

4. Don't do dumb stuff to fix your gig. Improve your product quality.

p.s. Axel now lives in Switzerland with a beautiful family and drives a Ferrari. Sometimes he chuckles about Bob when he has a bowl of Soup, but it passes quickly.

Great 🙂 It's a best advice for those freelancers who try everything, except learning more and improving. 

[markp]

this is the best thing I have read  for a long, long time.  

Here is a cautionary tale about selling diaper flavored soup.

Diaper-flavored soup may sound like a joke, but for one small business owner, it was a serious product that ultimately led to the failure of their company.

The idea for the unusual soup flavor came from a combination of a desire to be unique in a crowded market and a lack of understanding of consumer tastes, literally. The owner believed that by offering something truly unconventional, they would be able to stand out and attract a niche customer base in a marketplace just as full of the same exotic product  he was trying to sell.

However, the reality was quite different. The public reaction to the idea of diaper-flavored soup was overwhelmingly negative, with many people finding the concept revolting with many people asking for refunds and payments  for hospital bills after having their stomachs pumped and having to undergo therapy for damage to their mental health. Unfortunately many could not get refunds as they were told the product was as described. This negative perception quickly spread on social media, and the small business found itself the target of widespread ridicule. 

The small business owner who was really a 18 year old high school dropout with ADHD insisted he was a soup expart & was not put off by this negative publicity. In fact he believed that this negative publicity on social media would help his business as he was told to promote his service on social media to get customers.  He was not put off by the fact everyone was complaining that he was selling watered down poop and similar minded “business people” were encouraging him to keep doing what he is doing as all the people trying to help him were really jealous as they never thought of selling watered down poop themselves and it was a great way to get customers to pay for soup and get poop instead. It was only when a reputable businessman called NewsMike told him he was as full of as what he was selling he started to realize there could be a possible problem, but that moment of clarity soon passed.

In addition to the poor public reception, the business also faced challenges in the production and distribution of the soup. The specialized ingredients needed to create the unique flavor were difficult to obtain, as mothers did not like him knocking on their doors asking for old diapers and the cost of production was high. And the product got banned in some places due to food safety regulations, and the fact it gave off an extremely bad smell. The soup expart simply told his customers to spray perfume on it and eat cake afterwards. Customers complained constantly and sales dwindled with customers asking repeatedly “why are you selling poop” to which the seller replied. Sir, this is not poop. It is diaper flavored soup. 

The combination of these factors made it difficult for the business to turn a profit, and despite the owner's efforts to rebrand and pivot their product line with different packages and pictures and even going as far as to buy positive reviews for his business the company ultimately had to close its doors with the owner reduced to eating soup from a soup kitchen. It was only when he reached this point he realized there was a market for real soup, not the poop he had been selling, which NewsMike told him before. 

This unfortunate story serves as a cautionary tale for small business owners and poop sellers looking to stand out in a crowded market. While it is important to be unique and innovative, it is also crucial to have an understanding of consumer tastes and to conduct thorough market research before trying to sell watered down poop.

[darrendesign]

Great stuff, thanks for that 

[seo_garage01]

11 hours ago, newsmike said:

Once upon a time there was a guy named Bob. Bob ate some soup at a restaurant and saw lots of people enjoying it. Bob decided that he could make a killing selling soup. So Bob got a space and a hot plate and set about making soup. Now Bob had no idea how to make soup. In fact Bob struggled with Top Ramen. But undeterred, Bob hung a sign up to advertise his soup which read "EXPART SOAP." A couple people came in to buy soap, but Bob gave them soup instead, and then complained when the customers gave him lousy Yelp reviews. 

Frustrated by this, Bob posted his woes to social media and his friends were swift with advice. 

Axel, his best friend tried the soup and told Bob that the soup tasted like grey water from a washing machine after a load of diapers. He was trying to be nice. It wasn't actually that good. The suggestion was made to improve the recipe and learn how to actually make soup.   

Bob's friend Jamal made a different suggestion. He told Bob to just "be patient" and keep doing what he was doing and somehow business would improve.

Hans told Bob that the key to success was simply to remain open 24/7. Hans even suggested a sign that read "OPEN" even when the store was closed.  

Phoebe said the big "SOAP" sign was not good enough and suggested that he put a picture of soup in the window to reduce the confusion of the customers looking for soap. So Bob went to an nearby restaurant, took a picture of their soup and placed it in his window. He also removed his portrait from the window and put a photo of Gordon Ramsay in its place.

Pierre, the SEO expert gave Bob advice which said to change the keywords on his website to low competition keywords. So Bob removed Soap and replaced it with "ashtray".

Minsky told Bob that the way to get business would to to pray for success.

So, what happened? With the passage of time, Bob tried all the suggestions. He prayed, he took pictures of soup from even more competitors, he eventually changed his keyword to "please help me", he kept the sign that said OPEN even when he was home sleeping and he remained patient. Yes, he tried every suggestion, except the suggestion that he learn to make good soup. 

Nowadays Bob spends most of his time on a park bench, telling anyone who will listen how unfair the Soup game is. He goes on at length about how none of his competitors helped him get business. How he tried all his friend's suggestions even though not one of them has been successful, but most of all how rude Axel was. You see it was Axel who focused on the "Quality of the Product." But that hurt Bob's feelings, plus it sounded like more work as opposed to shuffling deck chairs on the Titanic.

The moral of the story.

1. Don't take advice from people who are not successful.

2. If you are not successful, don't offer advice.

3. Bob should have had smarter friends. 

4. Don't do dumb stuff to fix your gig. Improve your product quality.

p.s. Axel now lives in Switzerland with a beautiful family and drives a Ferrari. Sometimes he chuckles about Bob when he has a bowl of Soup, but it passes quickly.

PERFECT 

[sara_rob]

People like to make everyone around them blame for their mistakes and problems, but not themselves, instead of taking responsibility for their failures and improving their skills and knowledge.

[theratypist]

I missed this! I am so glad it got resurrected. Fun read. Thank you for your service Mike! Hahaha

[stonesadreana8]

This is an amusing story with an important moral. It shows how important it is to find truly knowledgeable advice if you are struggling with a problem. Furthermore, it also reinforces the idea that if you don't make an effort to improve the quality of your product, no amount of clever marketing or 'gimmicks' can guarantee success.

[miiila]

On 1/10/2023 at 12:07 AM, newsmike said:

Once upon a time there was a guy named Bob. Bob ate some soup at a restaurant and saw lots of people enjoying it. Bob decided that he could make a killing selling soup. So Bob got a space and a hot plate and set about making soup. Now Bob had no idea how to make soup. In fact Bob struggled with Top Ramen. But undeterred, Bob hung a sign up to advertise his soup which read "EXPART SOAP." A couple people came in to buy soap, but Bob gave them soup instead, and then complained when the customers gave him lousy Yelp reviews. 

Frustrated by this, Bob posted his woes to social media and his friends were swift with advice. 

Axel, his best friend tried the soup and told Bob that the soup tasted like grey water from a washing machine after a load of diapers. He was trying to be nice. It wasn't actually that good. The suggestion was made to improve the recipe and learn how to actually make soup.   

Bob's friend Jamal made a different suggestion. He told Bob to just "be patient" and keep doing what he was doing and somehow business would improve.

Hans told Bob that the key to success was simply to remain open 24/7. Hans even suggested a sign that read "OPEN" even when the store was closed.  

Phoebe said the big "SOAP" sign was not good enough and suggested that he put a picture of soup in the window to reduce the confusion of the customers looking for soap. So Bob went to an nearby restaurant, took a picture of their soup and placed it in his window. He also removed his portrait from the window and put a photo of Gordon Ramsay in its place.

Pierre, the SEO expert gave Bob advice which said to change the keywords on his website to low competition keywords. So Bob removed Soap and replaced it with "ashtray".

Minsky told Bob that the way to get business would to to pray for success.

So, what happened? With the passage of time, Bob tried all the suggestions. He prayed, he took pictures of soup from even more competitors, he eventually changed his keyword to "please help me", he kept the sign that said OPEN even when he was home sleeping and he remained patient. Yes, he tried every suggestion, except the suggestion that he learn to make good soup. 

Nowadays Bob spends most of his time on a park bench, telling anyone who will listen how unfair the Soup game is. He goes on at length about how none of his competitors helped him get business. How he tried all his friend's suggestions even though not one of them has been successful, but most of all how rude Axel was. You see it was Axel who focused on the "Quality of the Product." But that hurt Bob's feelings, plus it sounded like more work as opposed to shuffling deck chairs on the Titanic.

The moral of the story.

1. Don't take advice from people who are not successful.

2. If you are not successful, don't offer advice.

3. Bob should have had smarter friends. 

4. Don't do dumb stuff to fix your gig. Improve your product quality.

p.s. Axel now lives in Switzerland with a beautiful family and drives a Ferrari. Sometimes he chuckles about Bob when he has a bowl of Soup, but it passes quickly.

 

On 1/10/2023 at 10:14 AM, markp said:

this is the best thing I have read  for a long, long time.  

Here is a cautionary tale about selling diaper flavored soup.

Diaper-flavored soup may sound like a joke, but for one small business owner, it was a serious product that ultimately led to the failure of their company.

The idea for the unusual soup flavor came from a combination of a desire to be unique in a crowded market and a lack of understanding of consumer tastes, literally. The owner believed that by offering something truly unconventional, they would be able to stand out and attract a niche customer base in a marketplace just as full of the same exotic product  he was trying to sell.

However, the reality was quite different. The public reaction to the idea of diaper-flavored soup was overwhelmingly negative, with many people finding the concept revolting with many people asking for refunds and payments  for hospital bills after having their stomachs pumped and having to undergo therapy for damage to their mental health. Unfortunately many could not get refunds as they were told the product was as described. This negative perception quickly spread on social media, and the small business found itself the target of widespread ridicule. 

The small business owner who was really a 18 year old high school dropout with ADHD insisted he was a soup expart & was not put off by this negative publicity. In fact he believed that this negative publicity on social media would help his business as he was told to promote his service on social media to get customers.  He was not put off by the fact everyone was complaining that he was selling watered down poop and similar minded “business people” were encouraging him to keep doing what he is doing as all the people trying to help him were really jealous as they never thought of selling watered down poop themselves and it was a great way to get customers to pay for soup and get poop instead. It was only when a reputable businessman called NewsMike told him he was as full of as what he was selling he started to realize there could be a possible problem, but that moment of clarity soon passed.

In addition to the poor public reception, the business also faced challenges in the production and distribution of the soup. The specialized ingredients needed to create the unique flavor were difficult to obtain, as mothers did not like him knocking on their doors asking for old diapers and the cost of production was high. And the product got banned in some places due to food safety regulations, and the fact it gave off an extremely bad smell. The soup expart simply told his customers to spray perfume on it and eat cake afterwards. Customers complained constantly and sales dwindled with customers asking repeatedly “why are you selling poop” to which the seller replied. Sir, this is not poop. It is diaper flavored soup. 

The combination of these factors made it difficult for the business to turn a profit, and despite the owner's efforts to rebrand and pivot their product line with different packages and pictures and even going as far as to buy positive reviews for his business the company ultimately had to close its doors with the owner reduced to eating soup from a soup kitchen. It was only when he reached this point he realized there was a market for real soup, not the poop he had been selling, which NewsMike told him before. 

This unfortunate story serves as a cautionary tale for small business owners and poop sellers looking to stand out in a crowded market. While it is important to be unique and innovative, it is also crucial to have an understanding of consumer tastes and to conduct thorough market research before trying to sell watered down poop.

Grimm's Fairy Tales, the Business Edition.

The fairy tales that many never wanted, but many need.

 

Alas, they'll wait for the Good Fairy fluttering by and granting them the three wishes that they feel entitled to. And they'd even mess up those three wishes, if she'd actually show up. And live complainingly ever after.

[zeus777]

GOD this was such fun to read!!

Eeeeevery now and then I will try to pull an Alex, TRY to help people but it's becoming very rare recently. I guess we call it "giving up."
We need more Alexes, but sadly there are way too many Hans and Minskys and Jamals out there.

BTW I know a "Bob" in real life, he was my college teacher and an amazing artist/illustrator who worked on Shrek, Harry Potter and Van Helsing just to name a few films. He studied and drew his butt off and earned his success through pure hard work. I'm glad my teacher Bob is living a great life. 

On 1/10/2023 at 8:07 AM, newsmike said:

put a photo of Gordon Ramsay in its place.

 

I think this was my favorite part🤣🤣🤣

[visualstudios]

On 4/4/2023 at 7:27 AM, stonesadreana8 said:

This is an amusing story with an important moral. It shows how important it is to find truly knowledgeable advice if you are struggling with a problem. Furthermore, it also reinforces the idea that if you don't make an effort to improve the quality of your product, no amount of clever marketing or 'gimmicks' can guarantee success.

Ok, chat-gpt.