In this topic we joke about buyers and sellers

[forman_fahim]

Need to learn a lot of things in Fiverr 😀

[masud_graphics]

I believe 80% Here on Fiverr are Bowlers 😅. Or not?

someplace, you’re right maybe.

[leannelrivers]

The Non-finisher

The buyer who messages you with “Hi dear…” and then never completes the sentence. Who knows where they go…

The Promiser

The magical bringer of many future projects if you’ll just offer a bargain for the first installment of work. I think they end up in the same mysterious place as The Non-finishers.

The "Give me Jobs"

I think they’ve given up on responding to buyer requests, so contact fellow sellers instead.

The "But It’ll Only’s"

They’ve known you’re going to be on holiday soon. They know how long you’ll be on holiday and they know when you’ll return from your holiday. They sign off the order as complete. And just when you and your loved one are about to toast your well-earned break - PING! “I need a revision. It’ll only take you five minutes.”

We love 'em really 🙂

[clifton29]

the “Yes-place-the-order-sir” sellers

You ask them - “Are you sure you can do this work?”

They reply “Yes-place-the-order-sir”

Oh it seems incredible! You ask again “Are you REALLY sure you can do this job in that time?”

They reply “Yes-place-the-order-sir”

Ok. So, this seller might be very skilled. I place the order…

…

2 hours before delivery time : “Dear, I could not do the task, it’s not possible, I have done 10% of what asked, please accept my delivery, don’t cancel, don’t put 1 star review, all my family was dead last night that’s why I could’nt do the task. Order again I will do perfectly next time…”

Yep i had one the other day.

The seller was very friendly at first.

I placed my order cause I was confident about this seller.

Only to get stories afterward his mother was very sick because of Covid 19.

I was tricked in to his lie to only discover he was doing other jobs but didn’t want to finish my work.

I tried with Fiverr support eventually I let it go.

That’s the price you pay sometimes for being too friendly.

It’s all in the game I guess.

Most sellers I worked with are genuine

[psykkopatte]

Yep i had one the other day.

The seller was very friendly at first.

I placed my order cause I was confident about this seller.

Only to get stories afterward his mother was very sick because of Covid 19.

I was tricked in to his lie to only discover he was doing other jobs but didn’t want to finish my work.

I tried with Fiverr support eventually I let it go.

That’s the price you pay sometimes for being too friendly.

It’s all in the game I guess.

Most sellers I worked with are genuine

As a seller, I knew they were very creative but not at this point :rofl:

[merachev]

Not sure if it is appropriate for the topic but it is gold:

Hi, I have ordered by mistake. Please cancel the order.

Thank you

[psykkopatte]

Not sure if it is appropriate for the topic but it is gold:

Hi, I have ordered by mistake. Please cancel the order.

Thank you

It is 100% appropriate :rofl:

I got a similar one: can we cancel the order, I ordered the wrong seller

…

[barrisam]

The I-Am-Not-Like-Other-Buyers: These ones will receive your delivery, gush about it in the inbox but will never leave a proper review or ratings like other buyers.

The Middlemen: They have a client and they order on his/her behalf. The tricky thing is that because you have to work based on their own interpretation of the job, you will have to keep going back and forth with them and their clients.

The Free-Sample-Lovers: You could have a portfolio online or anywhere else that is as long as the Nile River and meets all their specifications, but they will always want a sample specifically done for them at no cost.

The Thieves: These are thieves, out to steal your gig descriptions, profile, gig tags and gig images.

The Thankers: The ‘ thank you sir for this information ’ forum users, lurking in every forum post.

[zeus777]

The I-Am-Not-Like-Other-Buyers: These ones will receive your delivery, gush about it in the inbox but will never leave a proper review or ratings like other buyers.

The Middlemen: They have a client and they order on his/her behalf. The tricky thing is that because you have to work based on their own interpretation of the job, you will have to keep going back and forth with them and their clients.

The Free-Sample-Lovers: You could have a portfolio online or anywhere else that is as long as the Nile River and meets all their specifications, but they will always want a sample specifically done for them at no cost.

The Thieves: These are thieves, out to steal your gig descriptions, profile, gig tags and gig images.

The Thankers: The ‘ thank you sir for this information ’ forum users, lurking in every forum post.

You could have a portfolio online or anywhere else that is as long as the Nile River

:rofl:

I always tell them “I’m sure the samples I provide are good enough to give you a clear idea of what my style is like,” in some cases they understand, in other cases they snap back, even insulting me saying stuff like “you’re saying that because you can’t do it and you’re not good enough.”

*hit report/block

[travelscape]

The Parrot: The forum user who keeps repeating stupid advice such as “stay online 24/7”, “stay active in the forum”, “ask for reviews”, and “share your gig on social media”.

The Anti-Googler: Creates a thread with a question that could easily be answered by using a search engine. Gets aggressive when this is pointed out to him.

The Tresure Hunter: Comes to Fiverr in search of treasure with a map given to him by a Fiverr guru. Still needs a bit of guidance, so comes to the forum with less than 1 minute read time to ask: “how can me get sell?”

The Copy-Paster: Copies forum posts made by other members to post them again later (often in the very same thread) to appear more knowledgeable.

Hilarious and spot on!

[barrisam]

the “Yes-place-the-order-sir” sellers

You ask them - “Are you sure you can do this work?”

They reply “Yes-place-the-order-sir”

Oh it seems incredible! You ask again “Are you REALLY sure you can do this job in that time?”

They reply “Yes-place-the-order-sir”

Ok. So, this seller might be very skilled. I place the order…

…

2 hours before delivery time : “Dear, I could not do the task, it’s not possible, I have done 10% of what asked, please accept my delivery, don’t cancel, don’t put 1 star review, all my family was dead last night that’s why I could’nt do the task. Order again I will do perfectly next time…”

lmao :rofl:

‘all my family was dead last night’

[seosea312]

So nice and wonderful to have this topic!
Such a nice topic very nicely you have been bought this joke.

I like it.

[psykkopatte]

The I-Am-Not-Like-Other-Buyers: These ones will receive your delivery, gush about it in the inbox but will never leave a proper review or ratings like other buyers.

The Middlemen: They have a client and they order on his/her behalf. The tricky thing is that because you have to work based on their own interpretation of the job, you will have to keep going back and forth with them and their clients.

The Free-Sample-Lovers: You could have a portfolio online or anywhere else that is as long as the Nile River and meets all their specifications, but they will always want a sample specifically done for them at no cost.

The Thieves: These are thieves, out to steal your gig descriptions, profile, gig tags and gig images.

The Thankers: The ‘ thank you sir for this information ’ forum users, lurking in every forum post.

The thankers are everywhere in the forum, I have a name in mind :rofl:

[leannelrivers]

The undecided: A buyer who wants something, but don’t really know what. You’ll spend more time trying to figure out what he wants than actually working on his order. The undecided impulsively contacted you and now hope that your mindreading abilities will figure out what he wants. He will often answer the seller’s question by: “I don’t know”, “I didn’t think about it” or “what would you do?”. When ask to describe what he wants he’ll often use words like “vibrant” “Eye catching” and “original”

Edit: Due to recent events I really needed to add this one.

The Mad Hatter: This Buyer often target artists. He will contact them with request that make absolutely no sens at first glance. He will request things like : I want a moon with elves as teeth bleeding out the city of Minas Tirith. Those request may scare sellers away as they may think this is a joke or a trap. But don’t be fooled, his request is legit and makes sens to him, he is just very chaotic at explaining it.

“I want a moon with elves as teeth bleeding out the city of Minas Tirith.” :rofl:

[justinayeh]

I’m still too new to have met many of these types, but my first buyer seems to be a lollipop lady. 😃

[psykkopatte]

I’m still too new to have met many of these types, but my first buyer seems to be a lollipop lady. 😃

[barrisam]

Let me add this one,

The Micro Managers: So you have a gig with a deadline of 72hours. They paid knowing this, but 1 hour later, they start with ‘how is it going?’, ‘do you have any problems?’. By the fourth hour, it’s a full-blown, ‘So how much longer is this going to take?’, 'Are you done yet?’

:woman_facepalming:

[maegan_bertrand]

As a seller in the Astrology and Psychics category, there are two types that make me cringe: the “Are YoU the DEVIL’s WIFE?!” and the “I want the name of…”

Are YoU the DEVIL’s Wife: “Hi, yes, I’ve never had a reading, but you should repent and find salvation, because offering to read tarot cards for money is going to bed with Satan!!!”

Yeah :roll_eyes:…

I want the name of…: “So, you do readings, good. My partner is having an affair, I know, and I want the name of the person, where they meet, what time they meet, and what they look like…”

😑 uhhhh

[cryingeyes]

Buyer: I have lots of work, I will hire you in the future if you do this job at a low price :rofl:
Me: Sorry I am not interested in the long term, 😁

[psykkopatte]

Buyer: I have lots of work, I will hire you in the future if you do this job at a low price :rofl:

Me: Sorry I am not interested in the long term, 😁

I got buyer like this once, it makes me sick people who want low price editing, in my case, he saw prices in my gig but was surprised it wasn’t that cheap, as if I was going to spend hours for 5€ :rofl:

[genuineguidance]

As a seller in the Astrology and Psychics category, there are two types that make me cringe: the “Are YoU the DEVIL’s WIFE?!” and the “I want the name of…”

Are YoU the DEVIL’s Wife: “Hi, yes, I’ve never had a reading, but you should repent and find salvation, because offering to read tarot cards for money is going to bed with Satan!!!”

Yeah :roll_eyes:…

I want the name of…: “So, you do readings, good. My partner is having an affair, I know, and I want the name of the person, where they meet, what time they meet, and what they look like…”

😑 uhhhh

That is weird. I have been here in the Astrology/Psychics category since 2013 and have never had anyone want me to guess their underwear color or if I am in touch with Satan.

Maybe because I offer more astrological stuff? Who knows. Those types who ask that silly stuff can be annoying. Main thing I have been getting lately, and I do not have a Gig for it is people wanting me to tell them how their stocks or some stock will fare. While I can do this, their “budget” is usually quite low. I don’t think they realize the amount of time it would take to go over a company’s birth chart to give them a heads up on its future.

GG

[mateusbl]

The Conqueror - This buyer start asking for discount, if he get it… in the middle of the process he will ask for things that is out of scope… just to get more and more of you for free.

The Questioner - This buyer will make a lot of question before purchase, but how much more question he asks less is the probability of he purchase your gig. They ask but never hire you.

[psykkopatte]

The Conqueror - This buyer start asking for discount, if he get it… in the middle of the process he will ask for things that is out of scope… just to get more and more of you for free.

The Questioner - This buyer will make a lot of question before purchase, but how much more question he asks less is the probability of he purchase your gig. They ask but never hire you.

I have got 15 questioners in 5 days, and didn’t get any order finally 😛

[lancodwini]

THE SMOOTH CRIMINAL: This sellers order your gig, but will NEVER EVER give you a rating. They’ll also make sure they explain in detail what they need done in their brief, which is most times clearer to them, so that they can keep you silent whenever you try asking a question for better understanding. The good part… 😎, they’ll always pay for a gig no matter the price and mark your order as complete without any revisions. 😂

[psykkopatte]

THE SMOOTH CRIMINAL: This sellers order your gig, but will NEVER EVER give you a rating. They’ll also make sure they explain in detail what they need done in their brief, which is most times clearer to them, so that they can keep you silent whenever you try asking a question for better understanding. The good part… 😎, they’ll always pay for a gig no matter the price and mark your order as complete without any revisions. 😂

I got it once, my last order, a woman who cooperated a lot and was looking for an editing, then once order was marked as complete, no review, no news, no DM to see if she was glad or not, no revision, nothing.

Usually they are the lollipop lady, I don’t get it :’(