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newsmike

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catwriter Grand Master

catwriter

Posted
Posted
36 minutes ago, newsmike said:

I realize that after I looked at your gig. @catwriter  ?

Thanks, but I stopped offering video scripts a couple of years ago, plus I don't really have experience with corporate videos (I usually did scripts for explainers).

These days, it's book blurbs and giving ideas for book titles.

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damooch916 Mentor

damooch916

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What in the eloquent blue hobbled hell is this?

Mike, my most trusted ally; my brother in reason … My stablemate - bound by fates and fury and by the foul descending of the maddened world - where we’ve stood true, our backs pressed in anguish as we’ve fought the purveyors of Utopianism. With their hands stretched forth as they surround us with their heads muddled from intoxicating syrups of lies and fear … Mike is unaware of the writers?

Here you stand. Shouting down the hallways of this great palace where our murals will forever be enshrined. Here you call, beckoning the swift witted and the imaginative. Here on the very steps where I’ve poured eviscerations like cheap wine and ripped the soul of any dank-headed jabber mouth that dare challenge our ascendence into forum lore.

And yet your call is not for me.

Oh! What poison is this bitterness to my mouth! What darkness are these echoed halls alone! Woe, have you wrapped your shrewd wings to smother me with such distress?

Do I not feel? 
Do I not bleed?

I’m speaking pre espresso, naturally. Once I’m at the mid day 14 shot espresso mark - I actually don’t feel anything. I also pick up CBS radio signals from 1938, proving my theory once and for all that “caffeine operates on exotic matter that bends spacetime regularly.”

Have you spared me this task because of my professional career Mike? Have you evaluated the implications of having a songwriter enter the muggy world of linear word slinging and determined that some alteration may impact the space time continuum? Have you had an apocalyptic vision, been consulted from on high, and determined that our planet’s preservation would ultimately rob me of this fine opportunity?  

Or perhaps this all boils down to a sub-level songwriter bias.

Yes. It’s true. I’m a professional songwriter. And I won’t live in the shadows of shame over it anymore, News Mike (If that’s even your real name). 

Okay. So I count to four for a living. 

And I sometimes write the word “ooohhh” onto a lyric sheet and ponder the merits of having pursued English Literature.

And sure, I may or may not have performed on the road in theaters and nightclubs that doubled as chateaus of hedonism.

And perhaps my contemporaries have the emotional intellect of bread crust (I’m looking at you bass players).

Fine. Perhaps I’m a third generation musically obsessive, progression geek, cosplaying as a cutthroat, unmovable alpha-male (or vice versa) who devoted his entire life to using phrases like “let’s build this to the bridge and come out of the solo on the 2minor before the break, chorus, chorus out, hit on diamond,”

And worst of all …

Yes. I’m a former child perfomer.

 
All that may be true - but above all else, I’m a writer. And every professional songwriter knows that our task is to extract the rhythm of all forms of all writing. We find the tempo of the masters, no matter where they perform their mastery - be it novels, plays, short stories or journalism. We deconstruct the sequences like chord structures and rebuild the pieces to learn their various methods. Because writers write. And any writer not skilled in that practice is a distributor of glitter covered gutter slime.

 

 On the other hand…

 

Golden heavens on high, there’s no way I would take that job! I can’t possibly be tasked with legalesing myself into corporate sensibility talk. I literally get paid to navigate the dreams of clients who operate firmly within the realm of a coo-coo clock. And it’s precisely my favorite location in this world. Because (1) I speak “coo coo” and (2) because there’s no way I can take such a decrease in my sexiness index. What’s hotter than some pianist singing wildly trivial pop lyrics while swaying as though the whole event were ethereal? I’ll tell you what, nothing.

So, despite your pleas to have me write this for you - I will have to decline. Then I’ll have an espresso. Then do some push ups. Then count to four a whole bunch. 
 

End scene. 

Edited by damooch916
Sing us a song you’re the piano man. Sing us a song tonight.
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newsmike Grand Master

newsmike

Posted
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Posted
5 hours ago, damooch916 said:

What in the eloquent blue hobbled hell is this?

Mike, my most trusted ally; my brother in reason … My stablemate - bound by fates and fury and by the foul descending of the maddened world - where we’ve stood true, our backs pressed in anguish as we’ve fought the purveyors of Utopianism. With their hands stretched forth as they surround us with their heads muddled from intoxicating syrups of lies and fear … Mike is unaware of the writers?

Here you stand. Shouting down the hallways of this great palace where our murals will forever be enshrined. Here you call, beckoning the swift witted and the imaginative. Here on the very steps where I’ve poured eviscerations like cheap wine and ripped the soul of any dank-headed jabber mouth that dare challenge our ascendence into forum lore.

And yet your call is not for me.

Oh! What poison is this bitterness to my mouth! What darkness are these echoed halls alone! Woe, have you wrapped your shrewd wings to smother me with such distress?

Do I not feel? 
Do I not bleed?

I’m speaking pre espresso, naturally. Once I’m at the mid day 14 shot espresso mark - I actually don’t feel anything. I also pick up CBS radio signals from 1938, proving my theory once and for all that “caffeine operates on exotic matter that bends spacetime regularly.”

Have you spared me this task because of my professional career Mike? Have you evaluated the implications of having a songwriter enter the muggy world of linear word slinging and determined that some alteration may impact the space time continuum? Have you had an apocalyptic vision, been consulted from on high, and determined that our planet’s preservation would ultimately rob me of this fine opportunity?  

Or perhaps this all boils down to a sub-level songwriter bias.

Yes. It’s true. I’m a professional songwriter. And I won’t live in the shadows of shame over it anymore, News Mike (If that’s even your real name). 

Okay. So I count to four for a living. 

And I sometimes write the word “ooohhh” onto a lyric sheet and ponder the merits of having pursued English Literature.

And sure, I may or may not have performed on the road in theaters and nightclubs that doubled as chateaus of hedonism.

And perhaps my contemporaries have the emotional intellect of bread crust (I’m looking at you bass players).

Fine. Perhaps I’m a third generation musically obsessive, progression geek, cosplaying as a cutthroat, unmovable alpha-male (or vice versa) who devoted his entire life to using phrases like “let’s build this to the bridge and come out of the solo on the 2minor before the break, chorus, chorus out, hit on diamond,”

And worst of all …

Yes. I’m a former child perfomer.

 
All that may be true - but above all else, I’m a writer. And every professional songwriter knows that our task is to extract the rhythm of all forms of all writing. We find the tempo of the masters, no matter where they perform their mastery - be it novels, plays, short stories or journalism. We deconstruct the sequences like chord structures and rebuild the pieces to learn their various methods. Because writers write. And any writer not skilled in that practice is a distributor of glitter covered gutter slime.

 

 On the other hand…

 

Golden heavens on high, there’s no way I would take that job! I can’t possibly be tasked with legalesing myself into corporate sensibility talk. I literally get paid to navigate the dreams of clients who operate firmly within the realm of a coo-coo clock. And it’s precisely my favorite location in this world. Because (1) I speak “coo coo” and (2) because there’s no way I can take such a decrease in my sexiness index. What’s hotter than some pianist singing wildly trivial pop lyrics while swaying as though the whole event were ethereal? I’ll tell you what, nothing.

So, despite your pleas to have me write this for you - I will have to decline. Then I’ll have an espresso. Then do some push ups. Then count to four a whole bunch. 
 

End scene. 

Tommy my friend,

I immediately thought of you. I did not offer you up right away because after years of working with singer/songwriter type folks I figured you would say something along the lines of.  

"Golden heavens on high, there’s no way I would take that job! I can’t possibly be tasked with legalesing myself into corporate sensibility talk." 

It is the creative types who as in Van Gogh's case cut off an ear, or in Bono's, sulk because the Evian is not at 55.7 degrees. 

 

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breals Grand Master

breals

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Posted
4 hours ago, webalamin007 said:

i will

Well done on writing a compelling and thought provoking reason why you should be taken into consideration.  Your dramatic and cinematic flair has made you the standout candidate in this process. 

The fact that you're a Wix website designer with a gig that's barely legible shouldn't deter you.

You're the man for this job bro! and you have my vote 😀

 

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zeus777 Grand Master

zeus777

Posted
Posted
On 1/10/2023 at 3:44 PM, filipdevaere said:

I have 30 active orders

Jiminy cricket, that's amazing!! (BTW I do actually have a friend who says that when he's shocked)
I pause my gigs after I get 3 or 4 orders in queue (depending on the contents of course), how in the heck do you handle 30??
Do you use post-its and post them on the corner of your laptop screen? 😅 Well at least that's what I do.
 

Good for you though, as much as I am grateful for every order I get, I'd never be able to deal with that many orders.
I think the biggest number of orders I've had in queue is like....7. Hahaha. 

Also sorry Mike, I don't think I can help you. I suck at writing I'm afraid. 

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filipdevaere Grand Master

filipdevaere

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Posted

@zeus777

31 orders now.

I always make custom orders. Some of my buyers are prepared to wait several months. I have active orders until May 14.

If the delivery time is more than 90 days (and it happens sometimes), then I make the order for 90 days and ask for an extension of the delivery time.

I keep track of my orders in an Excel file.

image.png.16d97a62669a79a5fb3dec839dfe1f9a.pngimage.thumb.png.b43be59bc3bfcbb92f62145d3ad7ab81.png

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breals Grand Master

breals

Posted
Posted (edited)

@brandsotech Have you been a naughty freelancer and set up multiple accounts?

I checked some of the reviews and it would appear that they have exactly the same profile and gig images as you?  How weird 😀

As we're in a casual conversations group, would you care to enlighten us?

Edited by breals
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newsmike Grand Master

newsmike

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Posted (edited)
9 minutes ago, brandsotech said:

Hello sir I am new on fiverr.I am logo designer.I want to get many orders on fiverr.I have 5 star rating on fiverr.Please guide me how to get many orders.I am waiting for your response.

This is my fiverr gig link

https://www.fiverr.com/share/PQvBoo

Best regards,

Brandsotech

Learn your craft. Do it yourself, no one will do it for you. Don't break forum rules by spamming and learn to understand context and stay on thread topic. Lesson 1.

Edited by newsmike
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