Let's catch up (The Unusually Non-Satirical Mooch Thread)

[andrea_kizinger]

For some guys any thighs are better than none.

For some guys any thighs are better than none.

😄

[eoinfinnegan]

My kinda thighs (not my thighs)

[nayruchan00]

My kinda thighs (not my thighs)

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Mmm, tasty! I’m already getting hungry just by looking at your picture, even though I ate like five minutes ago. 😄

[nikavoice]

🌭

[velocigraphtor]

Speaking of which, where is @velocigraphtor ?

Hey @writer99025 … hey @gig_freak

Hope you guys are doing grand! Hi to all the other lovely friends I made here at Fiverr.

Sorry I haven’t been keeping well recently, so my Fiverr days are currently at a halt, but hope to catch up with you guys real soon. I am at lack of words to express how much I miss y’all. Until then, rock on! 🙂

[saddu_writer]

So Emma can be flagged and banned just because the flaggers cant handle her awesomeness but this thread with all its highly inappropriate posts is still here.

[misscrystal]

So Emma can be flagged and banned just because the flaggers cant handle her awesomeness but this thread with all its highly inappropriate posts is still here.

this thread with all its highly inappropriate posts is still here.

Isn’t it great? 😄

[eoinfinnegan]

So Emma can be flagged and banned just because the flaggers cant handle her awesomeness but this thread with all its highly inappropriate posts is still here.

2 posts on this thread were flagged, one was removed, the other edited to remove the flagged content.

If there are other posts you believe should be removed then flag them with an appropriate reason rather than try to stir controversy.

Blah blah, issues with moderation blah, blah CS etc.

[misscrystal]

AAAHHH SPEAK OF THE DEVIL! Hi Emma!

That’s very strange. I would have sworn she gave me a heart on this post… it must have been my imagination.

Actually I know she did as soon as I wrote this and now it’s gone. What’s going on around here.

[eoinfinnegan]

AAAHHH SPEAK OF THE DEVIL! Hi Emma!

That’s very strange. I would have sworn she gave me a heart on this post… it must have been my imagination.

Actually I know she did as soon as I wrote this and now it’s gone. What’s going on around here.

No biggie, it was flagged OT and agreed to but then resurrected on second thoughts, given that the topic has been pretty loose from the start. Lost the hearts but I am sure you can survive

[damooch916]

No biggie, it was flagged OT and agreed to but then resurrected on second thoughts, given that the topic has been pretty loose from the start. Lost the hearts but I am sure you can survive

I disagree that the “topic” was loose.

The topic was our various tasks in the last 48 hours…what keeps us preoccupied, what we enjoy or find ourselves boggled down with and (most importantly, of course) coffee stains.

Then, I was lucky enough to witness a public confession. It was written in common place innuendo but it wasn’t graphic. I kept reading the comment … it was as though one of my mock forum etiquette characters had come to life. I’m prepared to give sworn testimony to the following:

1. I am not a “mad” scientist: I don’t even qualify…They have strict rules on wacky white hair and comb ownership.
2. My power bill is two months passed due and cannot withstand the enormity of breathing life into a spliced together cadaver: This is, of course, a guess. It’s been years since I even attempted to… er… I mean, that’s movie stuff.
3. I have a distinctly American accent… every time I shout, “It’s alive!!! It’s alive!!!” it’s so free of an eloquent tone that the woken corpse would laugh at me. I can’t withstand that type of humiliation. The last thing I need for my fragile entertainer ego is some dead guy making fun of me.

To recap: I, Mooch, did not set about to create an inappropriate thread. I did not intend to bring into existence a character from my long standing mock fiverr success series “UPTHEIRS,” I would totally, never bring people back to life and I own a comb.

[misscrystal]

I disagree that the “topic” was loose.

The topic was our various tasks in the last 48 hours…what keeps us preoccupied, what we enjoy or find ourselves boggled down with and (most importantly, of course) coffee stains.

Then, I was lucky enough to witness a public confession. It was written in common place innuendo but it wasn’t graphic. I kept reading the comment … it was as though one of my mock forum etiquette characters had come to life. I’m prepared to give sworn testimony to the following:

1. I am not a “mad” scientist: I don’t even qualify…They have strict rules on wacky white hair and comb ownership.
2. My power bill is two months passed due and cannot withstand the enormity of breathing life into a spliced together cadaver: This is, of course, a guess. It’s been years since I even attempted to… er… I mean, that’s movie stuff.
3. I have a distinctly American accent… every time I shout, “It’s alive!!! It’s alive!!!” it’s so free of an eloquent tone that the woken corpse would laugh at me. I can’t withstand that type of humiliation. The last thing I need for my fragile entertainer ego is some dead guy making fun of me.

To recap: I, Mooch, did not set about to create an inappropriate thread. I did not intend to bring into existence a character from my long standing mock fiverr success series “UPTHEIRS,” I would totally, never bring people back to life and I own a comb.

I was lucky enough to witness a public confession.

It was something I never thought I would see on the forum.

[damooch916]

Things are going fine in Fiverrland overall, on the other hand Tokyo was STINKING hot

today so that sucked…

Today was my day off so I decided to watch some movies and from all the movies I could have chosen from, I watched Misery. I know, creepy movie, but Kathy Bates was great in that movie. I went ahead and watched Dolores Claiborne right after that, and again, Ms.Bates was great.

Since it’s October and Halloween is coming, I’m thinking maybe I can create a new gig where I draw zombies. There are plenty of zombie illustration gigs available, but heck, I can give it a try perhaps.

BTW Mr.Mooch, how many cups of coffee do you drink everyday??

Mr.Mooch, how many cups of coffee do you drink everyday

I’m on a strict regimen that requires total dedication, determination and grit. It’s called the “Caffisystem Diet.” With Caffisystem, I don’t have to worry about the small things that hindered my ability to thrive…like sleep. Or food. It’s really simple, quick and easy.

Wake up, make a pot of coffee- drink it.

Proceed to the local cafe. Order four shots of espresso - in coffee. Remember to drink the contents quickly to avoid ruining your espresso shots. Repeat this process three times or until you’re sizing up parts of the enclosed structure and accessing the velocity it would require you run to break through the walls.

By now you’ll be weary of the “afternoon crash.” To avoid this, drink one redbull… in coffee…with a shot of espresso. Still, better to be prepared…we’ll return home for a pot of coffee.

Editor’s note: I’m gonna end this mock Nutrisystem gag here, because I can’t believe how close to the truth this is.

[damooch916]

I was lucky enough to witness a public confession.

It was something I never thought I would see on the forum.

It was something I never thought I would see on the forum.

I think it was a totally failed attempt at humor. Logically consider why anyone would put themselves in a position of 1) Blatant inappropriate forum behavior… 2) Subjecting themselves to ridicule… or 3) Even patronizing that their exploits are fodder for public discourse.

Imagine any other forum where you make that confession… You’d be sliced into bits.

Whether it was serious or not - my reaction was to patronize the comment with silliness because that’s what it was, silly.

So- how about we talk of our preoccupying hangups, distractions and gig happenings? Our awesome exploits of the past few days and the things we’re steadily working toward? It was my intention to see how everyone was doing.

Speaking of which… I read your nightly bedtime recipe. My circadian rhythm is on a two week reset. I wake up later and later until I stay up for 24 hours, forcing myself to wake up at 5am and repeating the process… These are the affects of a life lived playing music on the road and becoming numbed to time zones.

[vickiespencer]

Pretty boring. But yesterday I got my first order, so I’m pretty happy about that.

I got my first order yesterday too! Before that, I had only gotten buyer requests.

[vickiespencer]

I gave up all coffee a few months back and had some a few days ago as a special treat and I had forgotten how much I love good coffee. Now I want more.

I also had a tiny bit of Tennessee whiskey last night… I had given that up too but … I feel so decadent lately. I appreciate these things so much more when they are not used often.

The whiskey gave me the best night’s sleep I’ve had in a long time so it might become my nightly sleep medicine.

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This is my favorite whiskey. So good mixed with Agave syrup, a bit of water and lemon juice. Kind of like a Tom Collins but better. Of course, the fact that my son is the distiller makes it taste better.

[vickiespencer]

My day started out with a valium :crazy_face:, so I am babying myself today. Eating soft foods and napping is about all my day has consisted of.

[misscrystal]

This is my favorite whiskey. So good mixed with Agave syrup, a bit of water and lemon juice. Kind of like a Tom Collins but better. Of course, the fact that my son is the distiller makes it taste better.

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I was reading that bourbon has to be made from at least 51 % corn and I’m concerned about GMO’s in corn.

I came close to an un needed root canal once to the point of getting the shots in the roof of my mouth but the endodontist couldn’t get the temporary crown off. It turned out I didn’t need one after all. The dentist had put the temporary crown on with permanent cement.

He had also left a large hole on the inside of the temporary and when it was plugged up the pain in my tooth stopped.

[vickiespencer]

I was reading that bourbon has to be made from at least 51 % corn and I’m concerned about GMO’s in corn.

I came close to an un needed root canal once to the point of getting the shots in the roof of my mouth but the endodontist couldn’t get the temporary crown off. It turned out I didn’t need one after all. The dentist had put the temporary crown on with permanent cement.

He had also left a large hole on the inside of the temporary and when it was plugged up the pain in my tooth stopped.

Whistling Andy uses only locally grown corn. I will have text my son to see if it is organic and or GMO-free. The distillery uses only good old Flathead County grown Montana grains in their spirits. They have an excellent coconut rum. I wonder if it is safe for me to have an adult beverage now. My valium was at 7:15.

[vickiespencer]

I was reading that bourbon has to be made from at least 51 % corn and I’m concerned about GMO’s in corn.

I came close to an un needed root canal once to the point of getting the shots in the roof of my mouth but the endodontist couldn’t get the temporary crown off. It turned out I didn’t need one after all. The dentist had put the temporary crown on with permanent cement.

He had also left a large hole on the inside of the temporary and when it was plugged up the pain in my tooth stopped.

I had shots of to deaden my tooth for the root canal last week and then my throat was so dry, and I was so stuffed up from the smoke due to Montana wildfires that I could not breathe and kept choking and gagging so I had to give it up until today. We had rain for the last two days, so the air is not smokey, and does not look like fog and smell like a campfire. The valium helped me get through the whole ordeal.

[vickiespencer]

Mr.Mooch, how many cups of coffee do you drink everyday

I’m on a strict regimen that requires total dedication, determination and grit. It’s called the “Caffisystem Diet.” With Caffisystem, I don’t have to worry about the small things that hindered my ability to thrive…like sleep. Or food. It’s really simple, quick and easy.

Wake up, make a pot of coffee- drink it.

Proceed to the local cafe. Order four shots of espresso - in coffee. Remember to drink the contents quickly to avoid ruining your espresso shots. Repeat this process three times or until you’re sizing up parts of the enclosed structure and accessing the velocity it would require you run to break through the walls.

By now you’ll be weary of the “afternoon crash.” To avoid this, drink one redbull… in coffee…with a shot of espresso. Still, better to be prepared…we’ll return home for a pot of coffee.

Editor’s note: I’m gonna end this mock Nutrisystem gag here, because I can’t believe how close to the truth this is.

[misscrystal]

Whistling Andy uses only locally grown corn. I will have text my son to see if it is organic and or GMO-free. The distillery uses only good old Flathead County grown Montana grains in their spirits. They have an excellent coconut rum. I wonder if it is safe for me to have an adult beverage now. My valium was at 7:15.

Montana grains

it is probably GMO corn, most is now unless it’s organic.

[vickiespencer]

Montana grains

it is probably GMO corn, most is now unless it’s organic.

I will let you know. The owner is pretty health conscious.

[misscrystal]

It was something I never thought I would see on the forum.

I think it was a totally failed attempt at humor. Logically consider why anyone would put themselves in a position of 1) Blatant inappropriate forum behavior… 2) Subjecting themselves to ridicule… or 3) Even patronizing that their exploits are fodder for public discourse.

Imagine any other forum where you make that confession… You’d be sliced into bits.

Whether it was serious or not - my reaction was to patronize the comment with silliness because that’s what it was, silly.

So- how about we talk of our preoccupying hangups, distractions and gig happenings? Our awesome exploits of the past few days and the things we’re steadily working toward? It was my intention to see how everyone was doing.

Speaking of which… I read your nightly bedtime recipe. My circadian rhythm is on a two week reset. I wake up later and later until I stay up for 24 hours, forcing myself to wake up at 5am and repeating the process… These are the affects of a life lived playing music on the road and becoming numbed to time zones.

I think it was a totally failed attempt at humor.

I felt it was genuine excitement and a sense of pride in accomplishment he was expressing and he wanted to share it publicly. It was a milestone in his life.

[lucycodex]

Odd client? Well, aside from the 45 year old Justin Beiber fanatic who told me I can’t write porn well in 400 words or less with a whole backstory, I’d have to say the oddest one would be the guy who asked me to write a story about him having an affair with me.