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Hi everyone and thanks for reading my post. 🌻 

Reason I'm posting here and not on my social media is because I like the community here, and also don't know anyone personally here . . . so it feels better to me. 

Today's my birthday and I have the blues. 

I've always felt blue on my birthday for no particular reason. 

But this past year has been a great year in every aspect. Extraordinarily great. 

This is because two major incidents occurred that completely changed me (first was four years ago, and second was two years ago). Thanks to them, I suddenly began and am continuing to grow and develop in ways I never imagined possible. I'm talking about psychological growth; Understanding myself and others; Intuition; Emotional intelligence; Etc. 

Well, a while ago—when I realized my birthday was coming up—it was just obvious to me that this year's Bday would be the first Bday which I would actually be happy about plus actively celebrate plus not avoid (by sleeping through it, turning off my phone, not getting on social media). 

So how is it that even with the great past year + the 'new me' do I have the Bday blues? 

The big day (June 4th) just started at midnight (it's around 6 am now where I live). 

Well, three days ago I found out I have to start looking for a new apartment (and I just moved to this one three months ago). This is depressing for many reasons. 

And then two days ago me and my boyfriend broke up. 

I didn't really have any reaction to both things. 

Then yesterday, I suddenly realized that both things happened. So sad about one plus so anxious about the other. Both things together . . . suddenly really upset. 

So I cancelled the party my family had planned for today because I knew I wouldn't be able to find the energy to pick myself up within just 1-2 days. 

That's the story. I'll be fine soon enough (I mean that I won't be upset about the move or the guy for long). But right now I'm most upset because this birthday has gone to waste. [BTW Can't change my mind about the party cuz my family lives far from me, plus I've been awake all night and will be tired and need to sleep in a few hours.] 

From being on this forum for years, I know there are many, many, many people here who are special, nice, funny, creative and emotionally intelligent. 

So . . . I don't know. . . It would make me happy to read anything you feel like writing. 

I made sure to do the following: From 11:55 pm on June 3rd till 12:05 am on June 4th, I played Happy by Pharrell, on a loop, and danced the whole time—even though I'm depressed. 

I have a feeling that your comments (hopefully there will be comments . . .) will be a continuation of the Pharrell thing. 

Birthday Blues . . .

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