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Being a Woman on Fiverr


maiday
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It can't just be me that experiences inappropriate messaging on Fiverr, but when I browsed the forum this morning I couldn't find anyone discussing it. So here I am. 

It's exactly what you think it is - predominantly male users, some with female profile pictures (I suspect these are still males based on experience) appearing in my inbox asking for NSFW (not safe for work) content, asking how I am, can we be friends, mentions of underwear etc. 

I no longer reply to messages of simply 'Hi' or 'Hello how are you?' and have learnt to block those users immediately. But it bugs me. Of course it bugs me. If nothing else it's a waste of my time and attention. 

I'm a voiceover artist and I wonder whether (I suspect) female VO aritsts are more prone to this kind of messaging?

Fiverr doesnt always feel like a safe, professional space and I wonder who among us share this experience. 

Just wanted to open this up for discussion. Its definitely not just me. 

'Anna' 

(the fake name I use on Fiverr to retain anonymity for this very reason) 

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It's not as frequent for me as it used to be but it definitely happens. I have a horror gig that sometimes attracts some very messed up content. Just a while back I also remember being asked to show my 'pet cat' (if you know what I mean.)

I think VO likely attracts more because they get to hear your voice which is definiely a... turn on for some people I believe. 

I remember when I started out on here years ago I was asked to film videos with my feet and blowing up baloons (or something along those lines.) They were VERY insistent so I ended up just ignoring them. Had a few others but I think at some point I just mark them as spam too early (if they start with 'gimme orderses' or ' hyieie' so... 
I hope that it won't be so bad for you for too long though! 

(Ps.: Of course it bugs you. it bugs me online, outside, etc. it's not... supposed to be this way but it's just how it is and I wish it wasn't but...)

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I haven't had that exactly but I've had 2 random guys ask me to marry them on here and many more telling me they are desperate to work and do I need anything. I actually took pity on one guy and had him write something for me but it was truly terrible so I just suggested he offer a different type of gig and good luck and goodbye and then *block* because he messaged me hourly begging for work.

I know what you mean about the ones who just say 'hi' though. I mean, if I'm buying, I will describe what I want in the first message so at least the seller knows I'm interested in their service. I guess on pretty much every platform you have spammers though. If someone says 'hi' I just wait for the follow up message. I'm guessing spammers doing that send the same 'hi' to hundreds of sellers hoping to snare one!

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One time someone wanted me to write about their dating site, I told them that I wasn't comfortable with that, and they said something like "I thought you were a professional. I guess you're not married."

Other than that, no inappropriate comments of that kind, but that might be because people often think I'm a guy. Which doesn't bother me in the slightest.

I've seen other women complain about inappropriate messages, though. Requests for feet pictures, for example. Or more drastic stuff than that. Fiverr is cheaper than a specialized site, so some people are, err, trying.

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23 minutes ago, victel said:

If someone says 'hi' I just wait for the follow up message.

Thanks for your reply. 🙂 That's so kind of you to try and provide someone with work. Not something you should have to contend with on a 'professional' platform, but still.

The trouble with waiting for follow up messages without replying or blocking right away is that it affects your response rate. That's what I'm finding anyway. It seems you have to respond in one way or another - and promptly - or be penalised.

Anywho, congratulations on your proposals. 🙄☺️

Edited by maiday
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Since I don't show a photo of my face ( even if I did, I ain't a super model so I'll be fine 😛 ) and I offer translations/illustrations
I've never received messages from guys that tried hitting on me, also because of my Fiverr name people just assume I'm a dude.

I have read here on the forum a few times in the past about certain female sellers getting creepy messages though.
It's not just here at Fiverr, sadly things like this happen everywhere.
At least we have the report/spam button!

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Report them all. Over the years I've been here, I've seen this complaint from women on the site a dozen times or more. Unfortunately, there will always be creeps who act inappropriately.

It's only happened to me once. It's much more common for people to assume I'm a man. I get a lot of 'sir' and 'bro' messages. As far as inappropriate messages go, I had one guy trying to commiserate with me - in graphic detail -- (You know it happens to all us guys, right?) about erectile disfunction and an actual photo of an older woman in underwear. Humorous more than anything.

However, this whole topic is not humorous at all! Use a quick response (or just type 'spam' or 'reported' or similar) to avoid getting dinged for not answering and report them immediately.

Edited by melanielm
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I have never had messages of the flirting type. More than likely because of my age, which shows in my profile and gig images. Appearing to be the grandmotherly type, I occasionally get those who want work, but I report and block them.

However, it just occurred to me to wonder if the men who portray themselves as women in their profile images get this type of s****l harassment.

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15 minutes ago, vickiespencer said:

wonder if the men who portray themselves as women in their profile images get this type of s****l harassment.

I used to do QA for a social networking app. Sometimes I had to do tests on production which required a lot of active friend requests and conversations. I intentionally used "catfish" profiles to drawn in those people so they would generate the activity for me rather than me needing to use multiple devices to talk to myself. The harassment happened early, often, without hesitation or questions, and to shocking degrees even when I was saying and doing nothing. I could idle in a chat room, not interacting with it, and come back from lunch to 200 friend requests and most would turn into interrogations of my personal information. I also had to maintain a testing philosophy to check that any new feature abided the Block function so it could not be used as a vector for harassment, because we always got reports of blocks being bypassed if something slipped through in design.

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I've experienced inappropriate messaging and behaviour many times, but not for a while on Fiverr. I get some harsh messages about my pricing, but that's just cheapskates trying to batter me into a $5 submission. Some NSFW requests are getting through on buyer briefs. I wouldn't touch those with a barge pole. These situations can crop up anywhere, and the experiences range from someone having a crush but respecting your boundaries to outright abusive behaviour and tantrums. In all cases, I nip it in the bud immediately, and I couldn't care less if I bruise someone's ego in the process. 

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I do VO's as well and have had a few messages from users wanting me to craft something saucy "for personal use." I could tell two of them were trying to interact with me more in a way that would get them aroused so I just told them I was asexual and blocked them. I agree with Leanne; these situations crop up everywhere. I've been treated worse in the restaurant industry than here, though.

Edited by mandyzines
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On 12/1/2022 at 12:02 AM, vickiespencer said:

I have never had messages of the flirting type. More than likely because of my age, which shows in my profile and gig images. Appearing to be the grandmotherly type, I occasionally get those who want work, but I report and block them.

However, it just occurred to me to wonder if the men who portray themselves as women in their profile images get this type of s****l harassment.

Your idea is really great. Grandmother.😍

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