Please check how's this?

[hmz4klm]

Hello everyone, for the past 2 months I’m really worried about my profile description cuz I think the reason behind not getting orders from the clicks I receive is my profile description and I’ve changed it many times but I can’t see any positive outcomes.
Today I’m planning to change my current profile description to new one. And I’m going to show it to you people first. So once you all approve it, comment on it and tell me if something is wrong or missing then I will use it. Until then, I’ll wait.

so here’s it:
"Hello, My name is Hamza. I’m a full-time freelance graphic designer with great experience in the design industry. I’m detail oriented and a perfectionist so you’ll be sure to get the best looking design possible. I pride myself on:

• Clear communication
• Industry Standards
• Quality work
• Friendly service
• 100% satisfaction

And I love questions so please feel free to contact me anytime. I look forward to collaborating with you.
Thank you"

Hmm, so how was that? please tell me if you notice something wrong or informal. I’ll be very grateful to you people.
Thank you very much!

Hamza